Watching 'Elizabethtown' is in many ways like watching a young strange child approach you in the supermarket and start yapping your ear off. Sure it's kind of cute, but you just wish it would shut up and leave you alone.
Orlando Bloom plays Drew who after being responsible for the loss of nearly a billion dollars at a his company, decides he wants to kill himself. Just as he is about to commit the act he learns of his fathers death and has to go to Kentucky to arrange the burial plans. As luck would have it he meets a plucky young flight attendent and during an all night phone conversation they fall head over heels in love. Isn't that nice.
It's hard to attack a film whose intentions are so good-natured and sweet - but boy, do I need to. It's very hard to appreciate the happy moments in a film when even the scenes where people are hurting reek of tacky sentiment. As example - when Bloom decides to strap a knife to his stationary bike and kill himself; Bloom has this smirky pretty-boy daftness as if winking at the audience saying "I'm not really going to die, don't worry" and it kills a scene that with a stronger actor could have worked.
Throughout the entire film Bloom lovingly sulks and cheerily grins at every turn. He is a weak actor who can't even come close to the heart of a character. He can pull off action fare like Lord of the Rings or Pirates of the Caribbean - mostly because there are stronger actors to assist, and it's physical work - but he is the whole show here and it's a performance to scoff at, not laugh with.
On to Kirsten Dunst; a much more credible actor that Bloom who as well manages to fall flat on her face. Perhaps it's the southern accent that fades in and out with every passing scene. Or maybe it's the way she plays ditzy one moment and then switches to deep-thinker the next. Whatever the case it's a performance that is cheerily annoyingly off balance. It makes one wonder what the wonderful Amy Adams (Junebug) could have done with this role. Dunst can usually find sympathy in overbearing characters (Crazy/Beautiful, Virgin Suicides, Spiderman) but just like Bloom, all she has to do is look pretty and smile for the camera.
As for Cameron Crowe who's hollow screenplay is so cheerily in your face happy - it becomes devoid of any credible sentiment. This, much like the slightly better but still awful Singles - is just another excuse for Crowe to make a great mix tape. The music is terrific, but we're not paying to listen to a great soundtrack, we're paying to watch a movie. And this movie is so excruciatingly awful that's it's a waste of some fine music.
Orlando Bloom plays Drew who after being responsible for the loss of nearly a billion dollars at a his company, decides he wants to kill himself. Just as he is about to commit the act he learns of his fathers death and has to go to Kentucky to arrange the burial plans. As luck would have it he meets a plucky young flight attendent and during an all night phone conversation they fall head over heels in love. Isn't that nice.
It's hard to attack a film whose intentions are so good-natured and sweet - but boy, do I need to. It's very hard to appreciate the happy moments in a film when even the scenes where people are hurting reek of tacky sentiment. As example - when Bloom decides to strap a knife to his stationary bike and kill himself; Bloom has this smirky pretty-boy daftness as if winking at the audience saying "I'm not really going to die, don't worry" and it kills a scene that with a stronger actor could have worked.
Throughout the entire film Bloom lovingly sulks and cheerily grins at every turn. He is a weak actor who can't even come close to the heart of a character. He can pull off action fare like Lord of the Rings or Pirates of the Caribbean - mostly because there are stronger actors to assist, and it's physical work - but he is the whole show here and it's a performance to scoff at, not laugh with.
On to Kirsten Dunst; a much more credible actor that Bloom who as well manages to fall flat on her face. Perhaps it's the southern accent that fades in and out with every passing scene. Or maybe it's the way she plays ditzy one moment and then switches to deep-thinker the next. Whatever the case it's a performance that is cheerily annoyingly off balance. It makes one wonder what the wonderful Amy Adams (Junebug) could have done with this role. Dunst can usually find sympathy in overbearing characters (Crazy/Beautiful, Virgin Suicides, Spiderman) but just like Bloom, all she has to do is look pretty and smile for the camera.
As for Cameron Crowe who's hollow screenplay is so cheerily in your face happy - it becomes devoid of any credible sentiment. This, much like the slightly better but still awful Singles - is just another excuse for Crowe to make a great mix tape. The music is terrific, but we're not paying to listen to a great soundtrack, we're paying to watch a movie. And this movie is so excruciatingly awful that's it's a waste of some fine music.
