Review of Army of the Damned

I am right proud of myself, I think. I sacrificed 26 minutes of my life to endure watching the first third of this film which was an act of outlandish optimism and generosity. But thats as far as I could, or anyone should, go. Its just awful. And there you have it friends, a complete three word review. I could end right there but I feel the need to explain that Id heard a lot of the actors here were either wrestlers or porn stars, which intrigued me, and with a few old time character actors thrown in. A few of them I recognized, and Joey Fatone was in it. Not that that means anything but you know how it is when we watch new movies, we hope for good things, we hope for people to surprise us and reward us. We hope that even a bad film will be so bad its kinky good. We hope that someone at least tried, or made an effort, or cared about the work. Nope. No one tried in this movie, no one cared about anything whatsoever. There is no humor, no horror, no charm, no originality, no sex, no realism, no surrealism, no creativity, no emotion, no sophistication, no sadness, no joy. Actually the sadness comes after, when we realize that so many people are involved in the making of any film, and in this one all that time and money and effort were totally wasted, finally also taking a little bit of our own. Someone actually invested some money into this. How is that possible? All the subhumanly moronic characters in this movie keep screaming the same blathering profanities over and over (of course, just like in real life) and the line we hear repeated most often is "Are you f-ing kidding me?". I feel exactly the same way.