This is pretty much the "Inception" of God Awful cinema. We have an unknown narrator telling us the story of Santa Claus being stuck on a beach in Florida, who, in turn, tells a group of children a random story about Thumbelina, which is from the viewpoint of ANOTHER narrator, who happens to also play an aging female mole. Confused yet? This movie has a total of three different storytellers, yet it still manages to make absolutely no sense whatsoever. Probably because, from what I can tell, the Santa film and Thumbelina were made at separate times as promotional films for a now long forgotten theme park in Florida. So what we get is a hodgepodge of absolute nonsense involving randy moles, various farm animals being attached to Santa's sleigh,and hippies popping out of flowers. And what about that Ice Cream Bunny? Oh yeah! What we get is a very disturbing man in a filthy rabbit costume riding around in an antique Fire Truck loaded with helpless children with the doomsday alarm blaring out of some unseen loudspeaker. All the while, the rabbit's face remains emotionless and blank, lost in his own sickening thoughts which probably involve children and the dozens of melting ice cream bars he has packed inside various parts of his trousers. (Hey, they said he was an ice cream bunny, and I don't see any ice cream anywhere else, so I'll assume it's inside the costume). Anyway, the bunny comes to Santa's rescue. Some garbled, incoherent dialog seep past his most likely slavering lips, picks up Santa, and leaves the children and the sleigh in the middle of nowhere. I swear, just the sight of the bunny driving the truck through the park nearly made my skin crawl. I just wouldn't give it the satisfaction. So there you have it. . Try eating pizza and watching this movie right before bed. I guarantee the nightmares you have will make more sense than this sorry excuse for cinema.
Review of Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny
