1/10
Death of Your Two Hours
25 July 2014
There are many things that will take you out of a movie, bad writing, bad acting, bad story, and overall bad cinematography. This movie has it all, except for one thing, actual horror.

The movie starts off trying to sell you the typical horror movie lie; "This really happened, the following events were real events!" No, they're not. Nothing in real life could be as dull as this. Then we are greeted to what feels like an eternity of narration by our main lead, who explains to us everything she sees, to the point you want to scream "Yes I know you are looking at a bird cage, I can see that, you don't need to tell us!" After that, we are introduced to the other characters, a comic relief, a bimbo, and, of course, a cartoon character Christian, who, like all cartoon character Christians, are huge stick in the muds that have to ask Jesus if it's okay for them to poop or not. And whoever directed this movie choose the finest actors the dump had to offer, with delivery that rivals that of audio book narrators (not the good ones).

So let's get down to the biggest problem with the movie. It's not that the story is crap, or the characters are bland and cliché, or that the actors aren't trying; the biggest problem is, it's boring. The only thing that can get you through it is making fun of how bad it is, and even then it's still cringe worthy and the scenes of them just doing nothing but "ghost hunting" leave you with nothing; nothing to make fun of and nothing for you to be interested in.

So, if you're one of those people who like really bad movies, this is kind of in your alley, but if you want a suspenseful, scary ghost movie, I recommend Poltergeist. (Mainly because there's a scene in Death of a Ghost Hunter where the main character gags with disgust after some mentions the latter, I guess she's allergic to good movies).
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