Watchmen (2019)
1/10
In the end I asked "what's the point?"
21 October 2019
Warning: Spoilers
I assume all the plot holes will be wrapped up in the coming episodes, but I must ask, what's the point? The pilot writing is bland and all over the place. The characters actions, as echoed in other reviews, make little to no sense.

I was not impressed with the set pieces, which the actors seemed uncomfortable in. The acting is subpar at best, and I found the lead to be forced and unbelievable. Furthermore, none of the characters are very likable.

I found very little to be redeeming about the episode, stopping to ask myself multiple times what the show is even about? What is it aiming to say?

Literally, the first "bad guy" we meet is a white man, with an American flag hat, beard, drinking and driving, while listening to the rapper Future, and hauling a truck full of lettuce. This makes a police man nearby uncomfortable, and he "magically" appears behind the bad guy to pull him over.

Unbelievable dialogue ensues, and apparently both men decide they need their guns because the other has made them so suspicious: White man kills cop and throws lettuce at him.

BAM! That is your bad guy(s)! No other background given, no other reasons to like or dislike the main character, or the bad guys for that matter, other than their race, is ever given or explained.

It's literally a pick your poison of bad screenwriting and 2019 cliches.

The main "action" sequence of the pilot episode is a cow farm "shoot-em-up" where the heroes hide behind cow carcasses while getting shot at by mounted machine guns. No seriously. We spend five to ten minutes hearing the sound effects of cows dying and flesh smushing, while the heroes yell over each other and do nothing - yet all survive!



It's literally nothing new - all the tropes we have seen before, just done more poorly. I can't think of one original thing about this pilot episode that sticks with me...

It's run-of-the-mill race-baiting for a plot, and depending on your side of politics, you can either pretend it services you and you enjoy it, or you can refuse to have a lame-brain plot like this stuffed down your throat.

I'm giving this 3 stars out of 10 simply because it is a watchable TV show, yet not enjoyable.

I might even check out episode 2 to see if I was wrong at all with my analysis, but the glaring issues, backwards politics, and lack of creativity really hamper any future Watchmen could have. Not the best, HBO.
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