So, I decided to watch something unseen with Jim Carrey for instance, and was looking through his filmography, and found an eighties movie about vampires. 'Hmm', thought to myself, 'might be an interesting watch'.... well, fast-forward to the end of the movie and that was an hour and a half of my life that I will never be getting back.
The name of the movie was Once Bitten (1985). Its about a vampiress, who must every Halloween drink the blood of a virgin three times in order to appear as young as she is, but since she is living in the 20th century, naturally, compared to previous centuries, the quantity of virgins are dwindling. Here, steps our unlucky protagonist (Jim Carey), who after an argument with his girlfriend, stumbles upon the vampiress. That's the supposed plot, but in reality it is a movie about a douche, who had a stick up his butt, because his current girlfriend refused to have sex with him in an ice-cream truck in a place where every couples inside the cars are banging. So, instead of thinking, well, maybe I'm gonna book a hotel room, I'm just going to get laid, because my girlfriend refuses to give me any, and then goes: "No, oh my god, I made a mistake. Please forgive me".
The movie is supposed to be a comedy, but I did not laugh once. Even before halfway through the movie, I was wishing for it to end soon. It wasn't funny, it wasn't entertaining, it wasn't even a good parody about vampires. The only two redeeming qualities it had was the soundtrack and the fact that someone noticed Carrey's proclivities for physical comedy. That's it.
The name of the movie was Once Bitten (1985). Its about a vampiress, who must every Halloween drink the blood of a virgin three times in order to appear as young as she is, but since she is living in the 20th century, naturally, compared to previous centuries, the quantity of virgins are dwindling. Here, steps our unlucky protagonist (Jim Carey), who after an argument with his girlfriend, stumbles upon the vampiress. That's the supposed plot, but in reality it is a movie about a douche, who had a stick up his butt, because his current girlfriend refused to have sex with him in an ice-cream truck in a place where every couples inside the cars are banging. So, instead of thinking, well, maybe I'm gonna book a hotel room, I'm just going to get laid, because my girlfriend refuses to give me any, and then goes: "No, oh my god, I made a mistake. Please forgive me".
The movie is supposed to be a comedy, but I did not laugh once. Even before halfway through the movie, I was wishing for it to end soon. It wasn't funny, it wasn't entertaining, it wasn't even a good parody about vampires. The only two redeeming qualities it had was the soundtrack and the fact that someone noticed Carrey's proclivities for physical comedy. That's it.
