The first episode of Ray Galton's and Johnny Speight's sitcom set in a corrupt police station in the fictional London suburb of Woodley.
Aghast that someone has painted graffiti on the sign outside the police station, Inspector Spooner ( the late Ronald Fraser ) asks Irish vagrant 'Kelly' ( Dermot Kelly ) to paint out the offending words. As he does this, the fascistic P. C. Goatman ( the late Norman Rossington ) shows up for duty and thinks Kelly is responsible for the daub, so he throws him into a cell and disposes of the key. Unfortunately, that is also the place where Spooner keeps his collection of rare wines. Kelly has a field day opening the bottles ( using the corkscrew on his penknife ) and drinking the contents. So how is Spooner going to save his precious wine?
The untransmitted pilot episode starred Scottish actor Ian Bannen as Spooner. I do not know why he did not do the series. It is tempting to think he may have realised the show was not going to be any good and jumped ship. The pilot also featured Sally Geeson ( of 'Bless This House' fame ) as a P. C. and she did not make it into the series either. This episode is not bad, its funny in places. Peter Cleall ( of 'Please Sir!' ) plays 'P. C. Bolsover' who has seen too many episodes of 'Starsky & Hutch' and drives a similar car ( which he then crashes ). As Spooner, Ronald Fraser gives a performance he could hardly have been proud of, constantly spluttering over the cast members ( you wonder why they weren't wearing glasses fitted with windshield wipers ). Rossington is good as 'Goatman;, a cop whose solution to the U. K. crime problem is to give all criminals a good hiding. Dermot Kelly appeared in 'The Arthur Haynes Show', also penned by Speight.
Funniest moment - Goatman putting his arm into the cell in an attempt to strangle Kelly. When he brings it out, he has Kelly's dentures affixed to it.
Aghast that someone has painted graffiti on the sign outside the police station, Inspector Spooner ( the late Ronald Fraser ) asks Irish vagrant 'Kelly' ( Dermot Kelly ) to paint out the offending words. As he does this, the fascistic P. C. Goatman ( the late Norman Rossington ) shows up for duty and thinks Kelly is responsible for the daub, so he throws him into a cell and disposes of the key. Unfortunately, that is also the place where Spooner keeps his collection of rare wines. Kelly has a field day opening the bottles ( using the corkscrew on his penknife ) and drinking the contents. So how is Spooner going to save his precious wine?
The untransmitted pilot episode starred Scottish actor Ian Bannen as Spooner. I do not know why he did not do the series. It is tempting to think he may have realised the show was not going to be any good and jumped ship. The pilot also featured Sally Geeson ( of 'Bless This House' fame ) as a P. C. and she did not make it into the series either. This episode is not bad, its funny in places. Peter Cleall ( of 'Please Sir!' ) plays 'P. C. Bolsover' who has seen too many episodes of 'Starsky & Hutch' and drives a similar car ( which he then crashes ). As Spooner, Ronald Fraser gives a performance he could hardly have been proud of, constantly spluttering over the cast members ( you wonder why they weren't wearing glasses fitted with windshield wipers ). Rossington is good as 'Goatman;, a cop whose solution to the U. K. crime problem is to give all criminals a good hiding. Dermot Kelly appeared in 'The Arthur Haynes Show', also penned by Speight.
Funniest moment - Goatman putting his arm into the cell in an attempt to strangle Kelly. When he brings it out, he has Kelly's dentures affixed to it.
