- [last lines of the series]
- Archie Bunker: Oh, Edith - you know somethin'? If the whole damn world was to go to the dogs, as long as I had you by my side, y'know... or sittin' by my side... or, layin' here, like this, by my side... everything'll be... just okay. I've been blowin' my own horn, for a lotta years... but lemme tell you somethin'. I ain't NOTHIN'...
- [whispers]
- Archie Bunker: without you.
- [they kiss, then fumble over both drying their tears on his tie]
- Edith Bunker: [smiling through tears] You know somethin', Archie? You're a pip. A real pip.
- Dr. Sidney Shapiro: [finds out Archie didn't know Edith was sick after accusing him of trying to kill her] Please don't tell my father.
- Archie Bunker: [in shock] I won't, just don't play baseball on my stoop anymore.
- Edith Bunker: I wash your clothes and iron your shirts and make sure they're all folded in the right drawers.
- Archie Bunker: Well I could hire Sybil Goolie to do all of that!
- Edith Bunker: Sybil Goolie would never do any of those things for you.
- Archie Bunker: Why not?
- Edith Bunker: Because she don't like you.
- [pause]
- Edith Bunker: I LOVE YOU, Archie. That's why I do all those things for you.
- Archie Bunker: Whaddya mean he won't work St. Patrick's Day? The Puerto Ricans don't give a cucaracha about St. Patrick.
- Stephanie: Smelling cabbage can't make a person not walk.
- Archie Bunker: Well, I wouldn't be too sure about that. You know, the nose, that's a very powerful thing there. I remember once I was changing one of Joey's diapers you know. I lost my balance, I had sit down a minute.
- Dr. Sidney Shapiro: Mr. Bunker, I have known you since I was 6 years old.
- Archie Bunker: Yeah I didn't like you then either.
- Dr. Sidney Shapiro: And I don't like you now!
- Dr. Sidney Shapiro: Based on the smell in here, I can guess what you've been doing.
- Archie Bunker: [looks around funny] Well that might make somebody leave the room or open a window, but that's not gonna paralyze anybody.
- Dr. Sidney Shapiro: I'm not talking about cabbage!
- Archie Bunker: Well it can't be, I ain't ate any of it yet.