Terrible Teens
- Video
- 2016
- 2h 12m
YOUR RATING
- Director
- Writer
- All cast & crew
- Production, box office & more at IMDbPro
Storyline
Featured review
Lousy set-ups; beautiful young femmes
Titles are a significant selling point for porn: "Teens" indicates jail-bait content, while "Terrible" is mere chutzpah, a filmmaker/label disinterested in the inevitable goad for critics to knock the product.
Pornographer Mike Quasar/Quasarman has made thousands of videos over the past two decades and has recently provided Wicked Pictures with several fine dramas (e.g., "Inner Demons" and "Devil Inside"). But here he is lazily going through the motions with a result unfortunately similar to his usual grind 'em out product for 3rd Degree.
That is evidenced by the dumb, poorly acted but brief intros to each of the five requisite sex vignettes, generally dealing with young women of college or high school age and characterization. I suspect a shooting title having to do with school was discarded in favor of the generic TT monicker.
Prettiest babe is Megan Rain, whose winning smile should have gotten her gigs in toothpaste/tooth whitening TV commercials. Megan is tutoring a schlump played by Gage Sin, who is not among the usual Chatsworth studs from central casting, and who has a comically over-the-top mini-bio in IMDb written by "a fan" but sounding like old Gage wrote it himself. Megan doesn't do her squirting thing, and it's hard to watch her with creepy tattooed Gage - I would have preferred Elia Kazan back from the grave.
Aidra Fox is also ultra-beautiful but miscast as a teen -what was Quasarman thinking? I guess my assumption that this video was retitled would explain her presence, stuck as a real estate agent trainee (teenage??) at the "Immoral Proposal" remodeled mansion. She ascends the porn site's iconic spiral staircase and decides to take a bubble bath upstairs, getting fired for this on the job misdemeanor by her boss, but saving said job by humping him.
Cutie Ariana Marie, closest to the jail-bait age look, is applying for a dog-walker job for Danny Mountain, but she promptly lose his dog (we're told, as Quasar minimizes any action at all not related to sex) but retains her position by humping the Brit.
The ugly Small Hands and his endless Japanese Yakuza-styled tattoos ruins Jill Kassidy's scene, as the rising young starlet is working for this rock star character but too infatuated with him, so of course he punishes her with humping. Another petite, Maya Bijou, is Bill Bailey's personal assistant as he is severely miscast as some sort of business tycoon (but looks like a rube Mr. Pete wannabe as always). This scene is also clearly shot at the "Immoral Proposal" mansion.
Pornographer Mike Quasar/Quasarman has made thousands of videos over the past two decades and has recently provided Wicked Pictures with several fine dramas (e.g., "Inner Demons" and "Devil Inside"). But here he is lazily going through the motions with a result unfortunately similar to his usual grind 'em out product for 3rd Degree.
That is evidenced by the dumb, poorly acted but brief intros to each of the five requisite sex vignettes, generally dealing with young women of college or high school age and characterization. I suspect a shooting title having to do with school was discarded in favor of the generic TT monicker.
Prettiest babe is Megan Rain, whose winning smile should have gotten her gigs in toothpaste/tooth whitening TV commercials. Megan is tutoring a schlump played by Gage Sin, who is not among the usual Chatsworth studs from central casting, and who has a comically over-the-top mini-bio in IMDb written by "a fan" but sounding like old Gage wrote it himself. Megan doesn't do her squirting thing, and it's hard to watch her with creepy tattooed Gage - I would have preferred Elia Kazan back from the grave.
Aidra Fox is also ultra-beautiful but miscast as a teen -what was Quasarman thinking? I guess my assumption that this video was retitled would explain her presence, stuck as a real estate agent trainee (teenage??) at the "Immoral Proposal" remodeled mansion. She ascends the porn site's iconic spiral staircase and decides to take a bubble bath upstairs, getting fired for this on the job misdemeanor by her boss, but saving said job by humping him.
Cutie Ariana Marie, closest to the jail-bait age look, is applying for a dog-walker job for Danny Mountain, but she promptly lose his dog (we're told, as Quasar minimizes any action at all not related to sex) but retains her position by humping the Brit.
The ugly Small Hands and his endless Japanese Yakuza-styled tattoos ruins Jill Kassidy's scene, as the rising young starlet is working for this rock star character but too infatuated with him, so of course he punishes her with humping. Another petite, Maya Bijou, is Bill Bailey's personal assistant as he is severely miscast as some sort of business tycoon (but looks like a rube Mr. Pete wannabe as always). This scene is also clearly shot at the "Immoral Proposal" mansion.
helpful•00
- lor_
- Apr 18, 2018
Details
- Runtime2 hours 12 minutes
- Color
Contribute to this page
Suggest an edit or add missing content