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Reviews
Jarhead 3: The Siege (2016)
Missed the point of Jarhead.
Full disclosure.. I missed Jarhead 2, so can't compare it to that, but revisited Jarhead yesterday. This film *completely* misses the point of Jarhead. The ridiculousness of military life, how it's not all about explosions and U-S-A, U-S-A, U-S-A.. A lot of the time it's boring, it's stupid, and you're just a very small cog in a very large machine. Everything Jarhead went out if it's way to leave out is all this film is. Guns, unlikely firefights, explosions, the flag waving hero, the thought provoking speeches before the slow motion climactic ending. If you liked Jarhead and understood what it was about, you won't like this. It's entertaining, I guess, but like any fantasy hero soldier film. They took the easy route. This film won't be remembered 50 years from now.
Den of Thieves (2018)
If you can't take the Heat...make it yourself..
I like Butler.. I like his films. I liked this film. But it really is just Heat with fewer good actors. I fully expected someone to be told they don't get to watch their TV, or hear about someone with a great...bottom... Yes, there are differences, but the underlying plot is the same. I get it, Heat is a great, GREAT film. But in making this they must have known it was never going to be received as well as the original.
Designated Survivor: Run (2018)
Why not just use an English actress?
I'm part way through this episode, but felt compelled to add that Zoe McLellan *cannot* do a British accent. It reminds me of Dick Van Dyke in Mary Poppins. Just...stop.. Stop it. No! Just hire an actual British actor. There are plenty of them around.
Also, the number plates on the cars were all wrong and nobody... NOBODY sweetens their tea with marmalade.
*Edit* The police sirens were French, not British. Come on, guys.. These details aren't hard. Stop being lazy!
Overdrive (2017)
A load of cars, mushed together with a rubbish plot.
So many NOPE moments in this film. From the start, why do the rope from the bridge on to the truck, to then fall off, land on the car, and jump back on. Why not just jump from the car without all the rope nonsense? Also, while we're on the truck, if you cut the brake Suzy then the brakes jam on. You don't suddenly lose braking. This set the tone for the rest of the film.. Pointless plot 'twists' and too much going on. Are they just trying to Oceans Cars?
SPOILER.. If they just ended up killing him at the end, why didn't they do that at the beginning and just take his cars, without all the silly chasing around the mountains?
Stupid film.
Occupation (2018)
Oh Australia...I thought you were better than this..
Wow. It started out okay. A little bit of a cliché with the dysfunctional family and newly pregnant couple. But then it went downhill from there when the rejects from the Dr Who costume department turned up. If it's going to look that bad you could at least have made it a comedy. Australia does comedy really well and it would have saved this film. The plot then carried on with every single bad cliché from every alien film ever made. They even made us suffer for longer by making most of the second half of the film out of slow-motion shots with dramatic music playing, while the run towards the camera or have some really heart-warming moment. They could have shaved half an hour off the run-time if they'd done it in normal speed. Food for thought.
Hard Kill (2020)
Who does Willis owe money to?
This is awful... Why would Bruce Willis do this film? Does he owe money to someone? Does his house need work? A new kitchen? It says something with Brice Willis' acting is the best out of the whole cast.