Reviews

The only points I can give this film are for lead actress Emily Haack. She must have gone through hell making this.

Actor/writer Tommy Biondo, on the other hand, fails at doing everything vaguely movie-related. Nothing good can be said of his writing, because there just doesn't seem to be any writing beyond "in this movie I get to rape a girl." There is some rubbish about the titular scrapbook, which just ends up a half-forgotten plot device for most of the film.

Nothing good can be said of Biondo's acting, either; he delivers middle-school-level improv lines (which I'm sure he thinks are super-scary serial-killer lines) with all the menace of a rubber ducky.

The so-called "violence" is at a Three Stooges level of laughability, with none of the charm. He lightly pats his victims on the face, and despite said victim acting dutifully like they've been slapped by a bodybuilder, it is about as believable as third-rate WWE fights.

The very fact that a slim, squeaky, bandy-armed man with the physical intimidation factor of a stalk of celery is supposed to be able to kidnap, beat up, and rape a woman who looks about three times as strong as him, and later beat a big strong farmer twice his size to death, defies any attempt at suspension of disbelief. This man couldn't physically kidnap a sandwich.

The poor actress suffers though badly-done rape scene after badly-done rape scene, a scene of non-simulated fellatio, and a scene of actually being urinated on, by a bad actor and worse writer who seems to be on a sad wish-fulfillment trip that has no business calling itself a horror film, or even any kind of film.

If you're into horror, get another horror movie. If you're into porn, get another porn movie. This film fails entirely at being either. Hopefully it won't leave too dark a mark on the resume' of Ms Haack, who comes out of this whole sorry mess as the only one with any sort of talent whatsoever.

I remember growing up as a young "Doctor Who" fan in the USA in the 1980s. None of my friends were into it, in fact almost nobody I knew even knew what "Doctor Who" was, and there was no fandom I could participate in. Now I'm a poorly aging "Doctor Who" fan, glued to the new series, but this time other people are into it. The show is huge in the UK, and in the US things are catching on as well.

Which brings me to this show. As I watch it, of course there are a few things that grate against me. The hosts seem contractually required to say "totally" at least three times per sentence (ill-advisedly dragging that particular bit of slang back from its 1980s grave,) I can't get into the "companion academy" segments at all, and the female presenter sounds like she has been smoking cigarettes since age seven, or using a wire bottle-brush inside her throat.

But, it's a kids' show! And once I managed to relax my jaded 28-year-old scifi nut sensibilities, watch the charming interviews and the fun documentary segments, grin at the kids' artwork they send in, groove off the cheesy-yet-fun chemistry the hosts have with each other, enjoy the previews, and get dazzled by the guest stars, it blows me away thinking about how had something like this been around (and in my country) when I was a kid, this show would probably have been my second-favorite ever, second only to "Doctor Who" itself.

All in all, this show is a basically fun extra touch of "Doctor Who" for young fans, especially those still a bit too young to get into "Doctor Who Confidential." It's also not bad for the older fans who can watch it in the right spirits.