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Pluto (2023)
5/10
Remember: if I repeat something, it means I'm making a deep point. Remember: if I repeat something, the point I'm making must be deep. Remember: if I repeat something, it's be
16 January 2024
Pour one out for the anime boys, if not only because they're obviously very, very thirsty. Mediocre becomes divine in a drought. And I believe them in this much: it really is one of the best animes for a while, especially on Netflix.

God help us.

Pluto wouldn't be so bad if it didn't put on airs of being something better. If Ghost in the Shell had long, sanctimonious and slightly obvious monologues on ethics in robo-world that nevertheless touched on something interesting, Pluto undershoots by failing to really say anything at all

Chalk it up to a totalised, inescapable narcissism: in this universe there is either the inert thing or the human. But the thing is becoming human-like - oh no! The boundary is blurred! The ego assailed! How could it be? Surely this thought cannot possibly be taken farther!

40 years ago the Cyberpunk genre started with books about AI that transcended humanity in ways humans might only begin to grasp through religious symbols because it was just too *weird* to get our little meat heads around. Humans, for their part, were also evolving to adapt in the increasingly disembodied (and interchangably plastic-bodied) world.

Here we have mummy robots and daddy robots and robots with daddy issues and little brother and sister robots and sometimes they feel sad. It's yet another family drama - robots here are a different human aesthetic - at best a kind of coming-of-age structure in which robots deal with emotional adolescence as they approach adulthood (humanity).

And it's 8 hours long.
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Takeshi's Castle (2023– )
5/10
Lost some soul, but not all of it
4 October 2023
The entire history of reality TV has happened since the show's original run, and you'll see some of that regurgitated here. Expect audience reactions, endlessly repeated backstories and a highly curated group of quirky contestants who like being on camera. On top of that, expect plenty of nostalgia - it is, after all, the whole reason this reboot exists.

Higher production, less character - the usual. Same games with a different soul animating them.

But, somehow, it isn't completely terrible, so don't let me put you off a light watch to take your mind off things. I really enjoyed the guards this time around. However, I advise avoiding the English commentary as much as possible - not to idolise the just-about-okay OG commentary from Craig Charles, but Romesh Ranganathan and Tom Davis beg the question of just how bad the state of UK comedy must be for them to find continuous employment.
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5/10
An invaluable resource, if not a great film
30 October 2022
Yes, it's 8 hours of archive footage with a few bits of text to guide you along. Yes, it does feel long.

Curtis combines his weakness for going on a bit (everything he makes is just that little bit longer than the last, until we find ourselves here) with the weakness of a genre: an almost-pure archive documentary series that attempts to show "how things really were." Or, as the series puts it, this is "what it felt like to live through the collapse of communism... AND DEMOCRACY."

The result is something doomed to be highly misleading, in that it is up to the viewer to remind themselves that these are only the clips Curtis wants to show. It is just as far away from "raw unedited FEELING" as a state news report. Regardless, it's still interesting, if mostly in a voyeuristic sense.

Who else could get access to this footage? And who are we to turn down the opportunity to watch such fascinating glimpses of a period we may never otherwise have seen? Taken as merely a curated collection of clips there's much to celebrate. But 8 hours is a long time to reflect on how much you like a film, and eyes tired of this found footage funeral dirge may begin to question why so many clips are outside of Russia, feel the absense of events unshown, doubt the text or perhaps wonder what exactly Curtis is arguing here, because it definitely feels like he's arguing something.
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6/10
Generic late-night doc on enigmatic band Sparks
29 October 2021
A rather by-the-numbers talking heads doc on cult classic band Sparks. Expect an endless parade of old band members, producers, fans-come-stalkers and celebrities with no discernable connection to the subject, because that's what you'll get: mixed up with music videos, archive of the band, generic 70s/80s stock footage, and about 3 minutes of animation.

It's a TV doc, basically, and a 2 hour one at that, so is therefore perfectly watchable while never moving beyond:

Look at this thing or this person, isn't it cool.

Talking head: "yeah this thing was really cool, all the guys thought it was cool" Talking head 2: "ah yeah, what a cool thing! It reminds me of a moment I had." Now look at this other thing that is also cool.

Talking head 26: "woah!"

Basically it's a puff-piece that looks like it was filmed in 3 days. There is no conflict, nothing happens, there is no "present" in the film to form a narrative around. The conflict is ostensibly that the brothers who claim not to care about fame are not as famous as they should be. They're famous, just not famous enough, because they influenced everybody. (Don't talk about the Bowie shaped hole! Don't talk about all the other holes, either!) This doesn't really fly, so the film kind of wetly flops between the band's many albums. Nothing that bad happens to them: in the most dramatic moment of the film (a drummer we never see again cries to the camera), Sparks go a few years without making an album.

We only begin to learn about the Sparks Brothers in the closing few minutes, and what we see raises questions I would have like answered.

These guys don't really have friends, right? At one point a "half-girlfriend" from the 70s is mentioned, Russell still seems a bit hung up on it. They're obsessive workaholics, or at least Ron is, I'm not sure what Russell does sitting in a studio all day if he's neither writing the music nor the lyrics. Ron who "definitely isn't gay" has moved from Charlie Chaplin to John Waters. Russell's wig looks prepostorous. And what about the film they wrote (Annette: now out, apparently "pretty good")? We heard more about films they tried to make that never came out.

But it's still Sparks, you know, so it's at the very least mildly entertaining with a few sparks (!) of genius. Something one is expected to like a lot but would rather have in small doses.

Final thought: the film poster is the wrong way round. Ron (who writes the music) uses his once-prettier, more sociable brother as a "face."
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Clarkson's Farm (2021– )
3/10
Subpar Reality TV
12 June 2021
One could hardly make up the top review at time of writing, which gives it 10/10 at "quite good" before going on the defensive at phantom "feminazis."

Take it from someone who generally likes Clarkson's work from Top Gear to his books and documentaries: this show is proper early-morning BBC9+1 drivel. Neither particularly entertaining nor researched and informative, it comes across as a third-rate, highly scripted reality TV show. Were it not for Clarkson's ability to draw in a sycophantic crowd, this show would and should not ever have been made.

The cinematography and editing are "good enough" - as in, it's coherent, but the show never manages to capitalise on the few moments of humour or drama peppered sparingly throughout the series - the real issue seems to be Clarkson himself, who seems no longer able to engage with anything beyond the limits of his buffoonish media persona.

Ultimately, what is the point here? An important topic is given an idiotic treatment. Climate change violently intrudes in the first apisode but the best Clarkson can muster is mumbling "nothing I can do." Food security is stressed while he is intentionally useless and ruins his crop. Every important moment is similarly undermined by the feeling that, for a rich man in the closing stages of a life spent for the benefit of himself and himself alone, nothing matters more than hamming it up for the camera..
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5/10
An Intense Avoidance of the Now
22 July 2020
At times interesting, No Intenso Agora struggles to reach a point, hence its length. It is ultimately a film about the loss of something unexperienced. The director narrates mostly amateur footage from '68 in order to understand the "intense now" that supposedly existed then, and only then.

Again, we're back to Paris '68 in all its monotony. The director explores the commodification of the movement without going far enough to question whether the focus or "magic" we attach to that time is itself a product of this commodification. Or differently, without this stock interpretation of history, whether the arrogance of France to consider its own politics as particularly special is justified, and whether our accepting this moves us further from the truth, which is that an "intense now" is still available, lived or visible without masturbating over the same old images of France in the '60s.

The film also includes his mother, making this a more Freudian project, and her images of China, which the director describes as badly shot despite being the most visually interesting the film has to offer. I wonder how he would describe his own narration here? As it drones and meanders like its hastily recorded to get the timing of a rouch cut down before doing it again properly later.

The film and its narration take a turn for the better about halfway through, with welcome respite from May '68 in the form of Prague, its (re)invasion by the USSR and Warsaw Pact countries, and the aftermath. The amateur films are better, they are given much more space, and the director's analysis of them is sharper. The events, too, seem far more significant. When returning to France, the contrast adds a certain hilarity to all the performative posturing which all too quickly gives way to loud, complaint-filled passivisity and obedient labour.

The comparison is drawn, the point is almost reached. Why join in with the previous generation's nostalgia for its selectively remembered youth? Was there ever really an intense now for more than a select few? Is it telling that, as soon as we look elsewhere, a greater honesty and depth of feeling is found almost immediately? Is there an honest attempt here to reach an "intense now" or is this an action designed to further distance us from it, and, if so, why?
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Ad Astra (2019)
7/10
I Dreamt of Re-editing This Film
12 January 2020
Warning: Spoilers
Ad Astra is a mythological epic about a man's transformation from traumatised automaton to loving human. It happens to be set in space. Roy (Pitt) must travel to his father (Lee Jones), who happens to be near Neptune, and who's influence continues to be destabilising and destructive to Roy, as well as humanity as a whole. A fever-dream of allegorical events flows into a 79 days of deep-space solitude, after which Roy emerges like Jesus, the wood-carved Buddha or a particularly zen butterfly as a man knowing himself, forgiving himself, and forgiving others. Roy finds his father, who is still running from himself and cannot find the strength to stop, choosing death instead. In the tradition of myth-logic, Roy then performs several impossible feats as proof of his enlightenment in a grand return to Earth.

This is not necessary the film that we ended up with, but it would have been with:

> Less on-the-nose narration. Example include "they're using me!" (we know, we thought you did too) or when he goes all Tyler Durden at the moon space-port. Pitt's face is receptive, as if he's always listening, but his voice talks too much. > Less unnecessary exposition. I don't need to know the moon pirates are moon pirates, only that the moon is a dangerous place and proof of mankind's inability to find mass peace/ enlightenment in the way Roy will. (on that note, the space-monkeys didn't bother me. In myth-logic, it's fine, if a little obvious). > A stronger shift in tone after Roy's space hibernation, specifically removing threat. There were elements of a shift but it undermined itself on a few different counts. At this point, Roy was already ready to let his dad go, without more convincing (no space-hug needed), and the leap to his ship effortless and more obviously impossible. (Less exposition for the nuclear-blast surfing would achieve the same). > There was no need for him to return to his girlfriend. All we ever saw of her was in the context of a terrible relationship and so, from the audience's perspective, there was nothing worth saving. Returning to Earth should have been a fresh start in general, and it ruins the film's message to confine his new enlightened space-love to the girlfriend/mother archetype. > His aging escort seemingly served no purpose at all. > Stronger emphasis on the failure of communication. There are many times were Roy talks only for no one to answer, as if he doesn't exist. They build on this a bit with him eventually not waiting for an answer, but could have gone further with him simply speaking less and less - heading for the cocoon before he is quite there physically. > A clearer stance on ever present surveillance. e.g. The constant monitoring of Roy's mental health is itself helping to deteriorate his mental health.

There are perhaps other things. But in general, my experience was there is an incredible thought slightly-derivative space odyssey film in there somewhere, which only a little imagination can bring out. The cinematography is simply jaw-dropping - for once, an AAA film that uses texture! The performances are similarly mesmerising, with Pitt, on whose performance the entire film relies, doing my favourite work of his career.
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Cunningham (2019)
4/10
Notes from a long conversation with my girlfriend after leaving the cinema
4 November 2019
  • Great to see a film about dancing! A relatively unexplored sub-genre of documentary, and Cunningham was welcome for this alone. It adds to a hole that I suppose Wenders' Pina opened.


  • On that note, this film should not have been shot in 3d, which added nothing but nausia. We expect the 3d was entirely for the purpose of (a) copying Pina and, relatedly, (b) getting funding. But Cunningham's dances are far less spectacular and their presentation here likewise. The 3d only distracts from the movement in all but one Warhol-involved set, especially when edited with 2d archival.


  • First half entertaining, second boring. The film progresses at a monotonous pace: one thing happens and then another and then another. No real conflict or tension.


Which is a problem. Because there evidently was plenty of this, but only in reality. The movie, on the other hand, brushes past unconvincingly. No one in the film is given space apart from Cunningham - everyone else speaks to convince the audience how great he is. I wanted to hear from one of his female dancers honestly, in long form, of the darkness of Cunningham. This would help to flesh out his character, give us something to chew on, and organise the film into a narrative. As is, we grew progressively distrusting and disengaged with the Greatest Hits/ Victory Lap tone, before the film ends suddenly with the news that all his dancers left.

  • Ultimately we were left unconvinced that Cunningham (the dancer) was all that interesting. Fashionable certainly, he's attached to the right people, and I'm sure it would be great to be dancing as him, but the just-over-half-full prime-time-at-the-festival cinema was an endless circuit of yawns.


  • Nevertheless we feel cultured now.
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Microhabitat (2017)
9/10
Quietly Rebellious and Openly Heartbreaking
7 April 2019
Warning: Spoilers
A beautiful and heartbreaking exploration of what I can only recognise as post-university life: Miso, struggling to pay the rising monthly cost of rent, medicine, food, cigarettes and whisky, tries to crash with old friends while she finds somewhere cheaper.

Once bandmates, these friends have gone their own ways. Some want nothing to do with her, others a little too much, but what unites these re-encounters is Miso's open, unashamed charm and the devastating effect this has on her friends. Friends who, while only a little way up the road of compromises that seem to make up adult life, can't bear to be faced with someone who is not yet compromised.

Miso will pay for this. But my conclusion was not to judge her refusal to change, or either to condemn the so-called "friends" unable to take her seriously, but to lament the overwhelming misery of it all. The city is too expensive. It demands not compromise but servitude from those like Miso who lack support. She would have to give up all her joy to meet its standards. And this was the choice of her friends, and worse, a choice taken as necessity. (Meaning they fail to respect her choice to do otherwise).

The film is well paced, subtle and timed. The cinematography was soft, deep and understated: teetering between aesthetic/attractive and pragmatic/unconscious successfully. Similarly, the editing has style but also purpose, never distracting from the world of the film.

It's difficult to say just how impressed I am by Microcosm. Just that I can only begin to wonder why such a great film flew so low, and that I start getting annoyed when I do.
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6/10
Worth a watch if you can find it
17 January 2019
I really like watching Donna Haraway. She's great. I did drift off a couple of times though, and the green screen didn't sit well with me, and there are a couple of confusing segments (two minutes of the old internet pre-meme Cows with Guns, for instance). But overall the film pulls through.

Worth a watch if you can find it.
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Texhnolyze (2003)
8/10
the only anime I would ever recommend in public
31 December 2017
Have you ever watched something so good it made you want to throw up?

I am being completely serious - Texhnolyze, as well as being less than intuitive to spell, is nauseous in all the right ways. The grotesque, bewildering, horrifying and utterly despairing all have their place.

Don't let the first few episodes put you off. At first I kept watching for the style alone (no point bothering with the details but there's some crazy and better yet successfully experimental art/sound/space/editing stuff going on), but far better things grow out of it. The last few episodes, for instance, are honest-to-god one of the most jaw dropping sequences I have ever watched. What happens in between is also great, but fuck me, the end of it..

Lots of anime claims to think. Usually that means half-arsed monologues by side characters that either don't make sense or are completely irrelevant, trying to pass as philosophy by using lots of big words and being boring. Here's one that actually does.
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