Reviews

Once again, producers believe comic fans aren't too bright....

This garbage movie didn't even cover a freaking THIRD of the "Civil War" comic. Just like "Logan", it went by the name ONLY. The fact that they were fighting was there. Wow! A fight! I guess that's their idea of following the original story.

In the original story, a group of wannabe super heroes accidentally caused an explosion that killed more than 900 people, including children, and THAT'S what lead to the debate about there being a registry. The fake Thor wasn't in it (he kills Goliath), Spiderman doesn't take off his mask at a press conference to reveal to the world who he is in an attempt to show that he is cooperating with the registry. NOTHING!

Nope! Lets just Micheal Bay everybody and give them explosions, fights, and special effects. They'll shut up.

Trash....just plain trash!

Have you ever seen a movie that was so utterly terrible that it actually caused you bodily pain as you watched it? Yeah...this would be one of those movies.

Holy hell!!!

I almost don't even know where to start with this. First of all, the description of the movie you read near the title is a complete lie. An Ouija board had absolutely nothing to do with anything in this movie what-so-ever. I mean, yeah...there was an Ouija board...for like 30 freaking seconds, but absolutely nothing in this movie was built or based on it. That's like renaming the Civil War movie "Guy With Wings". Yes, there's a guy with wings in the movie, but that is so not the freaking topic, plot line, or even major hook of the movie. This crap here was all types of bad on all types of levels.

And can somebody tell me how someone can make a movie where 85% to 90% of the damn thing is not even explained!! I mean, seriously! All through the movie, they would lead you somewhere and just drop the subject and go on to the next one, then the main character continuously says she's sorry and didn't mean what she said and that's never explained either. An I'm convinced the dream sequences are just there to tick people off. Not only are they not ever explained, but they don't even make sense in the damn movie! At the end of the movie, she's covering the ears of a damn ghost and they go straight to credits. Are you kidding me?!

This is unbelievable. I've been on a quest to find something legitimate in the horror genre, but all I've found is that "horror" has become Hollywood's new short way of saying "horrible". Hollywood is just screwing with us at this point. It seems like ever since Witchboard came out in the 80's (look it up), anything based on an Ouija board has been a flat out abortion. This has to be the worst I've seen. And I'm not even saying that to be funny. This movie really is that bad.

And for the love of all things holy, can we please get the hell away from the same tired plot? Teenaged white chick...jock-like boyfriend...road trip somewhere, normally the woods...if they bring friends, there's always that one loser friend who's good for nothing but drugs and liquor and he normally dies first....things start getting bad, but for some reason "teenage chick" doesn't wanna tell anybody any damn thing...parents are either oblivious or just don't wanna believe jack all, even though people are dying..."teenage chick" is always the lone survivor, but you absolutely have TO get an ending that is so stupid that you wanna stand up and knock the hell out of the person sitting next to you....and you're the only person in the room!!

It's always the same damn thing!

Sigh!

I actually have body aches after watching this cinematic enema.

Freaking ridiculous what people are allowed to produce these days and call them movies. But hey...capitalism, I guess...

Lets see if I can sum this up....

First of all, ENOUGH WITH THE DRUNK AND DRUGGED PARTY GOERS WHO END UP DYING MOVIES!!

From the very beginning you can tell where this movie is going with the video camera effect and with the usual plot of partiers that go heavy on the drugs and alcohol and end up dying one by one leaving one really, REALLY cheesy female heroine who thinks she has everything figured out, but always ends up making the movie worse. But then it drops the camera effect and sticks with the latter. At this point I'm not even sure what's worse. BOTH concepts are way over-used and played out at this point.

As the movie goes on, I promise you, you will find yourself actually CHEERING for whatever the hell is in the sand eating people because the actors are really that annoying. The fact that anybody survived was a huge disappointment.

Anyway, breaking the movie down....you have the dumb jock, his dumb ass girlfriend who he "cheated" on with the stereotypical token white-acting black girl that Brandy and Kelly Roland made famous in I Still Know What You Did Last Summer and Jason Vs Freddy, respectively. You have the stoner (which in this case was airhead female as oppose to the airhead guy who always seems to be on his own island mentally). You have the female lead who plays the "hero", but only makes you want her dead just so you wouldn't have to hear her annoying ass screeching anymore. And then you have the black guy, who NORMALLY ends up dead first, but I guess in this case, instead of killing him first, they decided to completely kill whatever dignity he ever had and THEN kill him. Oh, and lets not forget the stuck-in-the-middle-dude, circa Cabin Fever.

So they all have a typical college drinking party at the beach. With no cellphones (stored in a bag and placed in the trunk of a car) they're all stuck where they stand since SOMETHING is under the sand eating whatever steps in it. That's it! That's the whole movie. One by one they get eaten leaving only the dumb jock, his girlfriend, and the chick he "cheated" on her with.

I'm going to assume that at the end of this crap fest that the jock died, because he was just sitting there with his eyes wide open and the girls walked away unharmed since whatever was in the sand decided to leave that beach and head to another......PLEEEAASSEE DON'T MAKE A SEQUEL TO THIS GARBAGE!!!!!!!

I only gave this thing a 1 because I couldn't give it a 0. I'd skip this one if I were you. If not for the terrible acting and plot, then definitely for all the damn way over-exaggerated screeching (I can't even call it screaming) coming from ALL ACTORS, not just the females.